Destiny rears its ugly head

By: Harvey

I don't root against the Cubs. I honestly don't. But it's still fun to watch them lose.

You see, when they hit the posseason the Cubs always find a great, entertaining way to lose. It's like the proverbial train wreck — it's usually horrific and ugly, but you can't help but be fascinated and maybe even snap a couple candid photos.

It's happening again this year. Just like last season, they look good all year long...just to take it on the chin in the playoffs. I understand the playoffs are a total crap shoot, but a team as good as the Cubs are supposed to be shouldn't be down 2-0 right now.

That's where Destiny steps in. That guy Destiny is a sick son of a bitch. Twisted sense of humor, to be sure. He senses his time has come, and he comes and gives Cubs Nation a swift kick in the naddies. As years of watching America's Funniest Home Videos has taught me, it's always funny to watch somebody else take a shot in the nuts.

I'm not going to crack any of these lame jokes about the fact the Cubs haven't won it all in 100 years, because I've heard enough asshole Cardinals fans doing it to realize it is a pathetic practice.

Instead, I will just point out that the Cubs are a team that is destined to lose. Cursed, perhaps? Sounds silly, but there are plenty of people who go out and pray at church to a being they've never seen. A lot of these people probably turn around and say the Billy Goat curse is stupid. Why?

Curses aside, let's face facts. These guys are the Lovable Losers. It's their role in sports. They don't win. The Earth would sooner spin off its axis. May be a sign of the End of Days of they do ever pull it off. It's just how it's supposed to be, and for it's just proof that everything is right in the world.