Monday, May 23, 2011

Boxer Ricardo Mayorga Twitting on MMA

Seriosly Mayorga? Seriously? You want that chubby BJ? What? You damn maricon.

Damaged Topps Gypsy Queens Replaced

By: Clay

It didn't take long for Topps to mail me back my replacement cards. Smooth transaction. All three cards are the same but without damage. So don't hesitate to mail your damaged cards in to Topps for replacement. I'll post the pics on Wednesday.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Threat Level Z with a Little Help from His Friends


Last night Big Z looked like the Big Z that he has always promised to be. Hooray!

Then the 6th inning happened. Z was working on a one hitter when, in typical Cubs fashion, everything went to shit. And not because the Reds were playing better. Zambrano had already gone through the Reds lineup twice and had a four-run lead. Twelve batters later, the inning finally ends with the Reds leading 6-4.

So that gives you this picture for our Big Z Threat Level. But, while I am thinking about it, let me do some more Cubs related pissing and moaning.

Why is it that EVERY TIME a ball is hit to Soriano, his first step is to the wrong direction. You would think that after playing LF for as long as he has, and the fact that he is a professional baseball player, his timing and mechanics in the field would be a little better than some fat-ass beer leaguer. Fuck. Stuck with this guy. We're stuck with him. $19 million this season. I appreciate the effort by Hendry to get quality players but God damn... Anyway the Cubs can trade him to Seattle for Erik Bedard?

Darwin Barney. It's a fun name sure. DO NOT fall in love with this guy, Cubs fans. Remember Ryan Theriot, Mike Fontenot, Corey Patterson, Matt Murton, Brant Brown, Ryan O'Malley, Todd Walker, Matt Clement and on and on and on... By the end of this season, Darwin Barney will be Darwin Barney. It's great that he is playing well but come on, it isn't gonna last.

“You get beat, you get beat,” Quade said. “But we’re beating ourselves way too much, and we’ve got enough issues competing as it is without beating ourselves. When I see that, if I’m going to lose sleep, I’m going to have my say before I do, that’s all.”

Well DUH! It's about damn time that Quade got pissed. Fucking handle this shit. Bench some guys. Send a message. Despite the fact that the Reds and Brewers are the better teams in the NL Central, it's still a piss poor division. And this Cubs team is piss. Play defense. Play defense. Do major leaguers practice fielding during the season? Do they? Not this fucking team. Are they afraid of the ball? Millions of dollars a year...scared of the ball...beating gatorade coolers...fighting in the dugout...

Sometimes I wonder if some of these Cubs players over the year have even really given a shit about winning and playing hard.

Sam Fuld is NOT a great player. He is Sam Fuld. It won't last and "yes", the Cubs are better off without him.

The Cubs traded Ted Lilly for Blake DeWitt(and minor leaguers) last season. DeWitt sucks. He sucks. And THEN the Cubs don't even attempt to sign Lilly in the offseason. He wanted to play here! We could have had Dempster, Garza, Lilly, Zambrano and trash! That's pretty good. But, alas, we have Dumpster, Garza, Zongo the Clown, Casey "No Control" Coleman, Andrew "The Hype" Cashner, Randy "Corn Encrusted Turd" Wells, James "Suck Ass" Russell, and some guy named Doug Davis. What? Yes.

"Ladies and gentlemen, your half-assed assembled, no defense, streaky hitting, $145 million 2011 Chicago Cubs. Thanks for being the most loyal fans in MLB." -Tom Ricketts and Jim Hendry.

Fuck This Team. See you next my new Pujols Cubs jersey.

573 All Natural Career Homers. No Additives.

Monday, May 16, 2011

Threat Level Rising

By: Dustin

I'll be interested to hear the updated Zambrano Threat Level from Clay after tonight's bed-shitting against the Reds. And by Reds, of course I mean the first-place Reds. I've made it clear already, but my opinion is this is also where Cincinnati will finish the season.

As things get nastier and nastier between the Cardinals and Reds, I find myself liking the Reds more and more. When these teams hook up, I honestly believe the Cardinals are more worried about the what the Reds are doing than what they are doing themselves. You have to take care of your own business, though, or nothing else really fucking matters. Better not forget that.

Of particular interest to me is the ever-tightening NL East, of course. The Braves are playing good ball after a less-than-stellar start. This is despite some injury concerns — Chipper has a slight tear in his knee (not the same knee as last year) and they're still figuring out what they're going to do about that. Heyward has a bad non-throwing shoulder that has kept him out of the starting lineup for the last several games. Peter Moylan's back surgery will have him out until August. Meanwhile, Philly is only going to get healthier with that greasy-looking fucker Chase Utley nearing a return along with Jose Contreras and Roy Oswalt. Domonic Brown has had some setbacks, but he and Lidge will both be around before the season's out . . . this team could be a lot better. Florida will fade — at least that's what I keep telling myself.

I've meant to blog about it before, and this is better late than never: what the hell is the deal in the AL Central? How can the White Sox be this bad? How can the Twins be the worst damn team in baseball? How can the Indians be this good? I know Chicago has won three straight series, but two were against Seattle and Oakland. I'm not impressed. Meanwhile, Cleveland is beating the holy shit out of a Royals team that is probably still playing a bit over its head at this point; last I checked it was 19-1 in the sixth, and some poor bastard named Vin Mazzaro had given up 14 earned runs in 2.1 innings. ESPN had this to say:

Vin Mazzaro just turned in, statistically, one of the worst relief appearances in the live-ball era (since 1920). 14 ER is tied for the second-most ER by a relief pitcher since 1920. It has happened on three previous occasions, and was only topped by the 15 ER charged to Nelson Greene of the Brooklyn Robins (later Dodgers) on June 20, 1925.

In the AL East, I have to say I appreciate the way they've managed to stretch this Jorge Posada "controversy" into three day's worth of stories. Why do I appreciate it? Because it serves as a reminder of why I resent pro sports on the east coast so much. They take absolute non-stories and turn them into weeklong soap operas that would be forgotten in most markets. New Yorkers will try to have you believe this somehow makes their market superior to yours. They're full of shit, and they're also assholes. Fuck them.

Here's this Midwestern hayseed dumbass bumpkin's uninformed and totally biased opinion of Posada's situation: he's old and he sucks because he's old. It happens to everybody. Some ride off into the sunset with a few shreds of dignity, and some go out in the manner Posada seems to be going out: looking like a washed up asshole who is unaware of the fact he has slowly devolved into an ineffective major league player. Much like his buddy Derek Jeter, he wouldn't be cashing these huge paychecks if not for the Yankees' ability to pay guys approximately 1,000 times more than they're worth. Oh yeah, Jorge . . . try not to have your wife bullshitting for you on Twitter anymore. It destroys the illusion that you have any testicles left.

It pisses me off that I've even devoted this much time to a division I supposedly hate, but I have to say one more thing: the Rays are somehow in first place. I can't see how this will be the case by the end of the season, but Jesus, I hope it is.

Rebuild or Compete...How About "Commit"

As I sit on the pot, I can't help but wonder what exactly the Cubs are going to do this season, in preparation of next season. By signing Carlos Pena and trading for Matt Garza, the Cubs showed they were going to make an attempt to compete this season. Hendry and Ricketts believed the 2011 NL Central to be a winnable division for the Cubs. I'm begining to think not.

Rather than a half-assed attempt, I would have much rather seen the Cubs play Soriano in right and at second in hopes to improve his trade value to an AL team in need of a DH with some versatility. And i certainly would have liked to have seen more playing time for Tyler Colvin. Why not play the guy as much as possible and see what production you can get out of him. It worked for Starlin Castro and is working for Darwin Barney.

I understand that the contracts for Fukudome and Soriano are so bad that they are unmoveable. Now, this is partly Hendry's fault and partly the player's fault. At the time of each contract signing, I was pumped and excited thinking about what these two could help bring the Cubs. What I (and Hendry) didn't expect was for Soriano and Fukudome to both be so damn awful at times that it could actual cost the team wins.

Granted, the Cubs organization has made some bad moves over the past few years and alot of fans are calling, and have been some time, for Jim Hendry to be fired. I don't agree. Hendry cannot predict if a player is going to live up to his contract. Everything Hendry has done for the Cubs has been with the purpose of creating a winning team. He put together the back to back division champs a couple of years ago. First time the Cubs went back to back since the 1907 and 1908 seasons. Hendry has commited to winning.

Ricketts, on the other hand, had committed to rebuilding. And yet, he gives Hendry to green light to sign Pena and trade for Garza. Please fellas, agree on one thing. Win now or rebuild. Don't half ass this Pujols/Fielder free agency period.

I'm starting to wish the Reds or Brewers would just run away with the damn division so the Cubs can start working in these younger guys. We need to see what we have left for 2011 that can help ultimatly bring a championship to the north side in the coming years.
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Thursday, May 12, 2011

Don't Blink

In case you missed Lyoto Machida sending Randy Couture into retirement, here it is. If you happen to see any of the UFC 129 post fight interviews with Machida, he mentions that Steven Seagal taught him that kick. The same as Anderson Silva on Vitor Belfort. Whatever. Seagal doesn't teach shit.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Big Z Still Stable

Big Z didn't get the win but he pitched well. Leave it to Kid K to blow the comeback.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Fun Fact of the Day

The Cubs rank 4th in the league in hitting and 27th in the league in hitting with runners in scoring position...and yet, they are only 3 games under .500 and 4 games behind the first place Cards. What a terrible NL Central
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Friday, May 6, 2011

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Topps New Website

By: Clay

About a year ago, maybe longer, I emailed Topps support asking them why their website wasn't up to date. And if you had been on there around that time, you know what I'm talking about. It was painfully awful and unprofessional. Anyway, They finally updated it a couple months ago. I'm guessing to go along with their 60th ann. The site looks good and is easy to maneuver around. Let's hope it stays that way.

I'm mailing in my damaged Matt Kemp relic, Evan Longoria framed paper and Jose Reyes framed paper cards after work today. So, we shall see how long it takes Topps to mail replacements back and if they are close in terms of value/quality player. I don't want some crap ass jersey relic of Hank Blalock. I still have a hand full of those and I even gave two away as part of an Easter gift to a young family member. Afterwards I felt awful when I noticed I gave him two Blalock relics. I should have mixed it up. No one deserves that. One piece of crap certainly is better than two pieces of the exact same crap.

In conclusion...mailing topps package today...debating what to do with Jackie Robinson relic card(not damaged)...maybe put some more Gypsy Queen on Ebay...still have Ryan Howard 2010 A&G relic card contest going(older post)...

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Ahhhh! Real Damages!

By: Clay

This afternoon I stopped by Target to fill my Topps Gypsy Queen void. Let me say, this was quite the day for me. I hand selected a couple rack packs and headed home for about 2 minutes of passion and pleasure! And just like how sweet love makin can turn sour...

Yes! First pack and I pull a Jackie Robinson bat Relic! My best pull of the year and from a Target rack pack none the less. Makes your heart pound and motor rev. But honestly, I wasn't expecting to get much else from these packs. Oh was I wrong.

Two framed paper serial numbered cards of Jose Reyes and Evan Longoria. Now, granted these two were going on Ebay...they are now worthless to me in an even simpler term. Damaged!

Oh NOOOOO! Not another! What you are seeing is a dented and dinged corner of a Matt Kemp relic card. Shit! Bad things come in threes, or so I've heard. Thankfully Topps takes care of such nightmarish incidents.